Friday, January 9, 2009

And he's out...

Its about 11pm on Friday night and I'm wide awake. Justin is out cold in bed with the movie "Elf" playing on the tube. Since I'm not tired, I thought Id play around on the computer for a bit (after going through mail, emptying trash, folding laundry, etc...) We went out to dinner and saw a movie a little earlier and I guess that was as much as the guy could handle after working all day. 

Since we got married there have been quite a few nights like this. I quit my job before the big day thinking that I'd start teaching again, but as it turns out... there are lots of music teachers in the area and students aren't as easy to find as I thought they would be. So Justin is making most the dough and I've sorta become a house wife. At first I loved it. It was nuts to wake up in the morning and be able to sit down and eat breakfast and read for a bit, go to the gym, just whatever. I started practicing every day and everything seemed great! But after a while I found myself counting down the minutes till he got home. I started feeling lonely during the day and for the first time in a long time I felt bored. I used to daydream at work about what it would be like to be bored. Now I find myself missing work! What's wrong with me??!! I told Justin the other day I wanted a baby just so there was someone around to talk to, lol. He said that was a dumb reason to have a baby and I suppose he is right.  I need to get more involved in the community I think. Start writing again, pick up some of my hobbies and interests I set aside when I entered the grown up world.

Normally this wouldn't bother me. When we were dating/engaged, i worked full time and later than he did so he had time to take a nap until I got off work and we could relax together. Now, I can't wait for him to get home every day and by then I'm ready to go out and talk, talk ,talk and he is ready to rest. But don't get me wrong. I always have things to do. Just not like I used to. I think I'm just having a hard time adjusting to all the change. Its hard to find a balance but I guess I should feel lucky I'm married to someone that takes care of me. :)

3 comments:

Janeece said...

Hey Christiana! I loved this blog post! I can really relate. I quit my crazy/ insane job in October and now I'm a housewife... it's super weird to be able to do anything at anytime and to get bored!! Especially when I used to feel uptight and overwhelmed all the time. Except my husband works at night, so we have weird hours. Anyway, I'm picking up all sorts of new krafts :-) Oh.. Congradulations on getting married!! I don't think I ever told you that. Whelp, I'll talk to you later. ~ Janeece

Candice McWhorter said...

Hang in there babe. You can always come visit us here :) You should definitely take this opportunity to develop talents because once you have kids...well unfortunately for the most part it stops until they get a little older.
Love ya!

Brandon and Jamie Smith said...

Good post! Change is ALWAYS hard to adjust too! Your situation will get better and you'll find more students soon. Isn't being patient FUN!??? right. Since childhood, we have always been told what to do with our time, but when we are finally "in charge" of our "own time" it's hard to know what to do with it. You'll just be better prepared for being at home all day as a mom. You'll probably really appreciate the interaction you'll have with your kids even more than others. So...let's pop out some babies together!